by ad/business manager, Connor McGuire

               Lament for me, the indifferent and diminishing teenager, for I am much too busy with quite a lot of nothing to do so myself.

               I am of a growing population.  I am of a party in my own.  I have many in my party, but we do not stand united, simply because we do not find the need to.  And with good reason:  Why should we?  My party will never act as one, because that defies our only platform principle that we seem to so adamantly defend – but not practice: “be yourself.”

               However, as loud as my voice is, I am muted over the sound of the way MTV thinks I should sound like.  I am muted over the sound of the way Calvin Klein thinks I should look like.  I am muted over CNN and Fox News telling me who is terrible and who is responsible for what is wrong with my country.  I am muted over my school district valuing my enrollment in high school at $5,000 and $50 a day for my being here and the only noises I can make loud enough for anyone to hear are the mouse squeaks in defiance I make among my peers.

               What use am I to America, “land of the free, home of the brave?”  Rugged individualism?  What is that?  Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness?  Whatever, the “O’Reilly Factor” is on and “Countdown with Keith Olberman” starts at 8.

               I walk through my days in a corporate haze.  I cannot turn on the TV without having to hear what I should spend my money on, where I should spend it, who I should spend it with, and who is trying to take it away.

               I am a product, both sold and marketed to.  I have a shelf-life and an expiration date.  I do not come fully equipped, so you will need to purchase all accessories for my full use (the fine print says I am useless without a cell phone).  I require double-dollar batteries, and you cannot recharge me.  I have no warranty, no guarantee of customer

satisfaction, and I have a large “Made in America” stamp on the back of my neck.  Like all typical industrial-world products, after I have served my “purpose” to the world, I will be tossed aside so the next generation of my beings can lead the way in.

               I know the succession of American Idols better than I know the succession of American presidents.  I am not the greatest reader, but I can give you a run for your money in cinema trivia.  Brad Pitt has a kid named Shiloh.  John Kerry?  Oh right, he has two daughters, I think.

               “Hey kid, when you grow up, what do you want to be?”

               Oh, I love riddles! I think the answer was – happy.

               “Get a good education so you can have a great job, kid.”

               What if I do not want to work for anyone?  Just bring me back to the

time when I was both naïve and uninformed.  Bring me back to the time when the coolest job in the world would have been to become a fireman.  Bring me back to the time when I didn’t care about being a surgeon, a lawyer, a CEO.

               I am the extreme balanced between two extremes.  I am either going zero, or 100.  I am the middle ground between two places where there is no real middle ground because to be anywhere else at my age is utterly useless.

               “I am not gonna vote, dude.  It’s not like my vote really makes a difference.”

               Not quite, but you paint in my shade of grey.

               “Corporate America will be the downfall of mankind, man!  The American government just wants you to all become worker bees and move in single-file lines, man!”

               Not quite there either, but getting warmer.

               I do not want Lou Dobbs or Sean Hannity; Walter Cronkite will do just fine.  Being a doctor never seemed like something interesting to do.  I do not care whether my pants are Dickie’s or Docker’s; they are just khakis.  Sprite, 7-Up and Sierra Mist have always tasted the same to me.  I only wear my watch to keep the time.  I wear the only necklace that I have because my father gave it to me.  Yeah, a real free-thinker.

               I am the effortless, hot-blooded, young, naïve, inconsistent, ineffective, apathetic, marketed, politically spun, uninformed and quite useless teenager with no great highs and no deep lows.  A generation of carbon copies will follow myself and my peers and all I have ever been able to do is simply stand idly by to watch as I become a fading youth.  Behold me and my generation of teenagers.

By Staff Writer, Royze Adolfo

            We have developed into a society that thirsts for as well as thrives on information and instant analysis. Today, it is almost an atrocious crime to take hours out of our lives fumbling for facts in files and folders, when such information can be easily obtained within minutes. (more…)